A Loss of Trust
by Celeste.J.Evans
Summary: A spoiler-free scene that (I think/I imagine) could take place in 5x05. Kate visits Rick in holding.


**Hello everyone. This is a 5x05 one-shot that has been swimming in my head since I found out that Castle would be arrested for murder (again). I wanted to get this out before the sneak peeks came out because I have a feeling this short little scene wil become moot. I don't usually do angst but I'm tired and I finally got around to writng this scene. I have three more chapters/one-shots to write before the end of Octover so wish me luck. And darlings, please review - and I don't mean one word blobs. It takes 30 seconds to just write a sentence about why you liked or disliked (within reason) a story. And I'm speaking for all writers when I say we work hard and we take risks when he publish our work and not all of it is golden but it's hard and the least a reader can do is be as detailed as he can.**

**Now that that little rants over, I must be off.**

**As always you can follow me on twitter vatrask or on my new blog: madamewriterofwrongs (.blgogspot) .com**

**Enjoy **

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Beckett had stood outside the holding cell in the far corner so many times she couldn't begin to remember them all but this one, this one she would remember forever. She had arrested the man on the other side twice before and he'd been arrested by other police officers many times before but money and innocence had kept him from having to sit in that holding cell handcuffed to the bench because this time, everyone was worried the charges would stick.

She stood outside the cage for a full minute, staring at him before she found the courage to step inside. She took a place on the other side of the bench but she could feel his eyes on her, anxious, scared and longing and it took all of her willpower not to give in and comfort him. But today wasn't playing the good cop or the bad cop; she was playing the cop who had to ask the hard questions to her boyfriend who was in jail because he possibly killed one of his ex-girlfriends. And it took everything she had not to hold it against him.

She clapped her hands between her legs, hoping to distract herself from the expectant eyes that awaited her. She couldn't face him when she asked her questions. It would only lead to questions that were meant to stay out of the precinct. "Did you sleep with her?"

Rick sighed, turning away from his girlfriend to stare at the wall, running a hand over his face. He needed a shave. He used to emphasize the rugged part of his ruggedly handsome persona but now, it was starting to itch. It reminded him too much of the lifetime before being in a cell with a beautiful woman bothered him. Finally, he sighed again "yes but not since..." meeting you, he looked over at her and found she was looking back at him with expectancy, hope. She understood. "Not in a long time."

"Then why can't you tell me what's going on?" Her fingers curled into fists to keep herself from pouncing him in frustration.

"I...I can't I'm sorry."

She shot up, pacing to the other end of the room and back to loom over him, pleading. "What is it? What is so important that you would risk losing everything over?" He flinched at her words, they both knew what she was talking and it killed him that he couldn't comfort her properly. "I know better than anyone that it's not worth it." Oh god, neither of them had meant to bring any of this up and but it was looming in the back of their minds so they couldn't get passed it.

"Kate..."

"Is it-" She swallowed, sinking down to her knees in front of him, grabbing his hands. They were so cold. "Did you do something illegal, is that why you can't tell me?"

"No I-I didn't."

She pulled her hands away, staring at the shaking digits as realization sank in. Her voice was so quiet he almost didn't hear her. "Then it's something you can't tell me specifically. It's because I'm your girlfriend."

He immediately grabbed her hands back, squeezing them reassuringly. "What? No god, no Kate I would never cheat on you. I would never do that to you."

When she looked back up at him, her eyes were shining with unshed tears and sleepless nights without him. "Then what is it?"

"Look Kate it's not that I don't trust you"

"Like hell it isn't." She pushed away from him, standing in the middle of the cold, empty cage. And suddenly she just couldn't keep still. "It is because you don't trust me and I'm wracking my brain trying to figure out what I could have done in the last five months to make you not trust me so much that you would leave me."

Her words sunk down to his soul and cut him to shreds "I'm not leaving you Kate I"

She finally came back to him, grabbing his face to hold his attention - not that it had strayed from her - and staring pleadingly into his eyes. "If you don't tell them what's going on then you are going to jail and as much as I'd love to I can't get you out of this."

They were silent for a long moment, staring into each other's eyes, before he placed his hands over hers and whispered "then what are we supposed to do?"

"Not 'we' Castle; you." She stood, her face stealing before his eyes until she was back to simply being a cop asking him questions. "When you decide what you want to do, I'll be here."

He tried to stand as she slipped out of the cage but he found himself weighed down by the handcuffs chaining him to the holding cell. Pleadingly he looked up at her "Kate"

She held up her hand to stop him, unable to face him any longer. If she was going to get him out of this mess, she couldn't face him like this. "Rick, I'm...I'm just tired. I'll come see you in the morning."

And then she was gone. And Rick was left sitting on that cold bench in the holding cell with his head in his hands, wondering how he'd let it get this far out of hand and how the hell he was going to win Kate's trust back.


End file.
